Heritage Profiles of Mountain People

LOL in Appalachia

Some laughter by way of Pap.

Oil_lamp2

Back in the day, Pap and a friend walked to see 2 brothers,who were musicians-in the hopes of hearing some good pickin and grinnin. Soon after arriving, they started asking the brothers to play them a song-but the boys kept putting them off. Even the boys’ Mother encouraged them to play a tune-all to no avail. Just as Pap and his friend were about to leave, one of the brothers said “Mommy blow the lamp out and we’ll sing one.” Seems the brothers were so backward they could only perform in the dark!

Snuff

A man Pap used to work with, thought his wife was going to have a nervous breakdown because she was dipping to much snuff. One day the wife said to Pap “Tell him Jerry the snuff don’t make me nervous. I can be waaay out there and take a little dip and it brings me right back.”

Tire

Many years ago, one of Pap’s friends went to Asheville to have his teeth pulled and be fitted with dentures. On his way home he had a flat tire. As he was bent over changing the tire someone came up behind him and pecked him on the shoulder. When he looked up a gentleman, asked if he knew how to get to the apple orchard. Having all your teeth pulled can cause quite a bit of bleeding-not wanting to spit blood by the man’s feet, Pap’s friend just shook his head no. The gentleman went back to his car and he got back to fixing the flat. A few minutes later the gentleman came back and pecked him on the shoulder again-wanting directions to a different location. Pap’s friend couldn’t hold it in any longer and the blood spilled down both sides of his mouth. The gentlemen started backpedaling and ran for his car. Later, Pap’s friend told him “why he thought I was one of those vampeers.” Pap’s friend was a little upset over the incident, because he’d worn his only white shirt and kept it perfectly clean until that man came around asking questions.

Hope you enjoyed Pap’s funny memories. Got any to add?

Tipper

p.s. Another hilarious story about Appalachia, a bra, and panties can be found at Appalachian Lifestyles-The Fair Affair.

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28 Comments

  • Reply
    Jennifer in OR
    September 12, 2008 at 12:59 am

    Great stories. I love the oil lamp. I wish I had our old kerosene lantern from when I was a child.

  • Reply
    noble pig
    September 11, 2008 at 1:56 pm

    Love the old stories, it’s wonderful you are documenting them all!

  • Reply
    dana
    September 11, 2008 at 9:56 am

    Those are funny. My stories are nearly as funny as Pap’s.

  • Reply
    Carletta
    September 10, 2008 at 10:41 pm

    These are good Tipper – I so miss my Grandpa who could talk all day about something.
    I wish I had recorded his voice.
    Love the top photo with the oil lamp and buttom jar – pure country – the best.

  • Reply
    Egghead
    September 10, 2008 at 6:33 pm

    I find it hilarious that women used to use snuff. Fun stories.

  • Reply
    Mary
    September 10, 2008 at 5:26 pm

    Oh, those are funny! I’m sure it did scare the man asking directions~but I do feel sorry for the guy that ruined his only good white shirt!
    Hmmm. . I’m wondering if I could play any instrument better if I only played in the dark, LOL!
    R~Mary

  • Reply
    Kathleen
    September 10, 2008 at 2:29 pm

    Enjoyed reading about your pap’s dentures. I bet that poor man that ran to his car talked and talked for months about that! LOL. blessings, Kathleen

  • Reply
    Miss Cindy
    September 10, 2008 at 12:37 pm

    Love the stories, In fact I’m thinking of trying some of that Sweet Snuff and see in it will really bring me back!!

  • Reply
    City Mouse
    September 9, 2008 at 9:50 pm

    Having had several teeth pulled, I can sympathize with Pap’s protagonist … and it’s dang funny too!

  • Reply
    SandyCarlson
    September 9, 2008 at 9:06 pm

    I enjoyed that. My Gram used to tell me stories like these, and I loved them oh so much. They were the personality of the family, really. They gave life to the history lessons, and when I learned that dry stuff in school, I could supply the people! What a gift. Thank you.

  • Reply
    Farm Chick Paula
    September 9, 2008 at 12:50 pm

    Those are all so funny… but I love the one about the snuff bringing her “back”!! That is hysterical!!
    One of the funniest things I ever heard happened in the little country church my Mom and Dad went to years ago…
    The preacher was in a big way of preaching and one of the men on the front row was about half asleep.. the preacher came across the story in the Bible about the rich man and Lazarus and how the rich man died and went to Hell and how he cried for somebody to just “give me a drink of water”. Well, Brother so-and-so on the front row woke up enough to hear that last part and goes running out the back door only to come back with a glass of water for the preacher! (He thought the preacher was needing a drink….)

  • Reply
    petra michelle
    September 9, 2008 at 12:08 pm

    LOL’ed throughout the post, Tipper! And read the bra and panties’ story. Hilarious!
    Don’t think I have any stories to equal them! There’s one of my mother that stands out. When she was younger, she wore wigs; she didn’t have the time to fuss, what with six children and work. We went to the beach, and she waded into the water. A wave covered her. A few minutes later, we nearly gasped at the sight of a wig floating away from us, and really thought the waves had taken her. She stands; yes, the waters were right off the shore; she stunned, the rest of laughing so hard, we thought our sides would split.
    Memories! What would we do without them!
    Great post, Tipper! :))

  • Reply
    Darla
    September 9, 2008 at 12:04 pm

    Are you kiddin’ me? Those were great!!!

  • Reply
    The Tile Lady
    September 9, 2008 at 8:14 am

    Cute stories! Poor guy getting his shirt all bloody! My step-grandfather used to pinch snuff. I have one of his old snuff cans. Thanks Tipper for visiting my site! Sorry about the mixup.

  • Reply
    The Texican
    September 9, 2008 at 7:51 am

    Back in the day many women used snuff for a little pick me up. One was my great grandmother. She was very prim and proper, but she carried a tin of Tube Rose snuff in her little white hanky along with a wooden toothpick. Someone made up a little sound effect verse using the names of several popular snuffs to imitate the sound of a three speed shift on the steering column of a car. Uuuuhdin Garret, Uuuuhdin Scotch, Uuuudin Tube Rose. If you ever drove an older model standard shift automobile you can probably remember the sound and make sense of the verse.

  • Reply
    wkf
    September 9, 2008 at 4:52 am

    Those were great!!
    Totally off subject. Is that a Cuda?

  • Reply
    Mary
    September 8, 2008 at 9:47 pm

    Tipper,
    I certainly did enjoy Pap’s stories. I hope he will tell some more that you will share with us.
    I remember my great-grandfather not having any teeth, or at least that’s what I thought. Grandpa went and had his teeth pulled and got a denture. He came home from the dentist, sat down to dinner (noon) and took a bite of fresh home baked bread. The bread of course, stuck to the denture. Great grandpa took those dentures out and the only time he ever wore them again was when he went to town. Even then he complained about “store bought teeth.” LOL
    Blessings,
    Mary

  • Reply
    Carolyn A.
    September 8, 2008 at 6:31 pm

    The tooth story made me remember this one about my Dad. I was sitting on the front steps of our little rented Baltimore rowhouse doing homework and listening to some 60’s music. My Dad would always come through the back door and look for anyone who was home. I remember him opening the front door and saying to me, “Turn off that ya-ya music!” I looked up because I knew he was kidding. There he was with a big smile on his face and no teeth! He had just been to the dentist and had the rest of them pulled so he could be fitted for his plate. I feel over on the steps laughing and he just stood there grinning at me.
    Another time we were sitting at the dinner table talking and laughing when Dad came home from work. He walked into the dining room and said, “Are ya’ll done laying that egg yet?” We couldn’t eat from laughing so hard as he took his place at the head of the table and laughed too.
    Loved Pap’s stories. Aren’t rememberies (as we call them) wonderful? xxoo

  • Reply
    Louise
    September 8, 2008 at 2:15 pm

    Fun, fun stories. I’m so happy you have a family that makes it possible for you to know stories like this!

  • Reply
    Mark Salinas
    September 8, 2008 at 11:19 am

    Great memories Paps…thanks for sharing!

  • Reply
    Amy @ parkcitygirl
    September 8, 2008 at 10:58 am

    LOL is right! Thanks I needed a good chuckle 🙂

  • Reply
    Fishing Guy
    September 8, 2008 at 10:50 am

    Tipper: I can’t remember any funny stories that would match this vampire story.
    I do remember one time we were ice skating and building a fire. My buddy decided to break a log against a tree. I got behind the tallest kid and the broken branch flew over his tall head and hit me directly on my hat. My red leather hat, do you rember them, was filled with blood before I was able to walk for help. A clamp was used by the doctor to close the wound.

  • Reply
    teresa atkinson
    September 8, 2008 at 10:49 am

    Good morning. Wanted you to know that I am drooling over that jar of buttons in the first picture.
    Have a great week.

  • Reply
    Paula
    September 8, 2008 at 10:44 am

    I love the snuff story ~ seems it was the chaw that was keeping her “sane”, huh?! Too funny!

  • Reply
    RazorFamilyFarms.com
    September 8, 2008 at 10:36 am

    What a great story! I’m not sure that I know any great dentistry-like stories. If I did — yours now takes the cake!
    Hilarious!
    Blessings!
    Lacy

  • Reply
    Pam
    September 8, 2008 at 9:57 am

    Hey Tipper. I enjoyed Pap’s funny tales. It is good to have a laugh.
    I love that mason jar of buttons too, in your picture. Mama always kept a jar of buttons when I was little. She would cut them off the old worn out shirts before she put the shirts in the rag bag. We didn’t waste anything.
    You have a great day!
    Pam

  • Reply
    Beckynsc
    September 8, 2008 at 7:37 am

    On New Years Eve, my Mom, Dad and I, in our truck, and my Aunt and Uncle in their car, went to visit my Great Uncle. We ran out of gas in the truck and nothing was opened. We took a hose off the car siphoned gas into a cup and put it in the truck. We ran about a mile or so and ran out again. I told them atleast now we know how far we can get on a cup of gas.

  • Reply
    Jan
    September 8, 2008 at 7:25 am

    Tipper, I will chuckle all day about being so shy you can only sing in the dark.

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