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Granny

I’m sharing some of my favorite old sayings with you today. I hope you’ll leave a comment and add to the list.

  • That dog won’t hunt
  • If that don’t make your wood burn nothing will
  • Your milk of human kindness has turned to bonnie clabber
  • She threw more out the back door than her man could tote in the front
  • As poor as a bear that wintered up in the Balsams
  • Weddin’ without courtin is like vittles without salt
  • Beauty never made the kettle sing
  • Never get your horse in a place where you can’t turn around
  • I ain’t been in his shoes and I can’t gauge his footsteps
  • It’s never to late to mend
  • Where’s there’s bees there’s honey
  • What can’t be cured must be endured
  • Don’t miss her no more than a cold draft after the door’s shut
  • He’d buy a load of cord wood to peddle out in hell if you’d give him till Christmas to pay for it
  • Sit down and rest yourself, settin’s cheaper’n standin’
  • Lookin’ like the hind wheels o’ destruction

Vibrant descriptive wisdom filled language = Appalachia

Tipper

 

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56 Comments

  1. Has anyone heard “hell split a rail” as an expression of mild disbelief? My dad (Southwestern Pennsylvania right on the West Virginia border) said it all the time and I’ve never been able to trace it. Does anyone know?

  2. “You would try the patience of Job!”

    About a habitual liar: “He’d climb to the top of a tree to tell a lie rather than standing on the ground to tell the truth.”

  3. My Papaw used to say “I Declare to my Soul.” Now he was a jovial man with a devilish grin and a great sense of humor and good temperament, but if he declared to his soul all the grandkids (14) knew to get to gettin’ cause somebody was in trouble.

  4. My mom says a lot of these but she also says “they’re tighter than the bark on a tree” (meaning they’re frugal), “useless as tits on a boar hog”, “(they’ve) got more problems than Carter’s got liver pills.” (Jimmy Carter, I assume). She also uses “uglier than sin” and “till the cows come home” a lot.

  5. My grandad : I’ll be there if the sun comes up an the creek don’t rise , I always thought it was the creek we fished in but he was talking about the creek Indians they were not a tribe to be recond with .
    My grandma: why bless his heart he’s as nervous as a Tom cat in a room full of rocking chairs .

  6. I have a question. My mom grew up in the country near Charleston, WV. When I was little (I’m 69 now), she would say “ooo guy” meaning move over, out of the way. I’m curious if anyone has heard this, or what the origin of the phrase is. I just remembered it and really wish I’d asked my mom about it before she passed.

    1. “Carter’s” was a company that made Liver Pills…they came in a green tube about as big as a roll of nickels and the pills were white and tiny…a litte bigger than a bb…was a time when they were as popular as Bayer Aspirin.
      So imagine how many little Liver Pills the Company “Carter’s” musta had…hence the sayin, “more than Carter’s has Liver/little Pills”.

    2. I wonder if this was meant to be the sound of an old style car horn (usually spelled something like awoogah) but with a regional accent.

      1. One my granny would use is,
        “If it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck.”. This was mainly used with remarking about a young woman wanting to wear something skimpier or more revealing than the elders thought appropriate.
        My great grandmom used to say,
        “Even a stopped clock is right twice a day. ” I still use the word “hope”which is slang for help. as in “Do you need a hope?” it’s a beautiful thing about being from Southern Appalachia, our language is certainly colorful.

    3. ooo guy or oooga, It is the sound made by the horn of a river boat or tug boat. When you were in the river and you heard this ‘oooga’ sound, you knew to move over cause a big boat was about to come through!

    4. “Ooga, ooga” is the imitation of an old car horn, think old Model T. If you were driving down the road and wanted to alert a pedestrian to get out of the way, you would honk the horn and it would make a noise like that.

  7. Did you ever hear of these:
    I’ll pop you right in the beezer (old British for “nose”)

    Pop your bill on that (invitation to have a bite of something)

  8. My grandad always has two phrases in the winter
    “Colder than a witches tit in a brass bra”
    “Colder than a well diggers ass”

  9. When my Mother would hear a new and unusual “saying,” one that she could make no sense of, her frequent response was that it sounded “overly contrived.”

  10. “I plum ______” as a way to emphasize what came after, such as “I plum forgot,” which basically means “I flat-out forgot”

  11. My mom would say “You slay me”, meaning you make me laugh. My grandmother would say “Free show” when the kids were acting out in public. She meant you better get in this house so the neighbors don’t see you acting like a fool!

    1. My mother would say I’m a gonna go up to that school house and talk to that teacher.
      If that don’t make you cry, then your wood is wet.
      I feel so contrary today.
      Well now that’s quire.
      Soups on!
      Well I declare!
      Two heads are better than one.
      Well I hope my die.
      There’s a fox in the hen house.
      She’s expecting.
      Flat as a fritter.
      I’ve done told you more than I know.

  12. My Granny Georgie Sutton would always tell me i was “Meaner than a Striped Snake and tougher than a pine knot” . Any time I seemed like my mind was in another place her brother, Uncle Paul would say “A penny for your thoughts?” He’d also tell me I was growing like weed and the last time he saw me I was just knee high to a grasshopper.

  13. Here are some of the saying from around here:
    “Drunker than a boiled owl.”
    “He ain’t worth the salt that goes in his butter.”
    “Crooked as a Rattlesnake.”

    1. “Well that ain’t more than an ornamental polecat” [totally useless, frivolous]
      “naked as a jaybird”
      “if the good lord’s willing, and the creeks don’t rise” [Hank Williams’ sign-off on his radio show]

  14. Tipper love your saying dad told me one time I guess I was skipping around and probably getting on his nerves. He said Moo that was my nickname go over there and sit on your fist and rare back on your thumb .

  15. Having been raised in poverty, poor as church mice was a favorite. A friend in childhood, thru school, would appear to have something better than any thing I knew, I would ask, where did you get it, reply ” stole eggs and bought it”
    Not a sin to be poor, but it sure hurts.

  16. Just a few more: Grinnin’ like a summer ‘possum
    Cute as a speckled pup
    Drunk as Cooter Brown- or, Three sheets to the wind!
    That’ll cut her rain down to a drizzle
    You ought to stay all night- we’ll make a Baptist pallet, or hang you on a nail!
    Cold as Christmas out there

  17. How about:
    Happy as a pig in slop.
    Cute as a speckled pup.
    I love all these expressions they are Appalachia and they are us!

  18. Most of ’em have already been covered:
    Lie down with dogs, wake up with fleas
    If wishes were horses, beggars would ride
    Grinning like a mule with a mouthful of briars
    One I didn’t see:
    Fetch more bees with honey than you do with vinegar.
    Really have heard almost all of these at some point in my life. The one about the bear in the Balsams brought back sweet memories!

  19. I’ve heard varitions of most of those. The wife was asking me about one I used the other day to describe a relative of hers, that she swore she had never heard when I said he was “wiggling like a worm in ashes”.

  20. Thanks so much to Granny. I am certain she is probanly a world of info. Here are some and could be repeats. 1) he/she wakes up in a different world every day. 2) slicker than nark on a log 3) uglier than sin 4) crazier than a bed bug.

  21. If that don’t ring your bell your clapper must be broke.
    He rows with one oar.
    He’s about half a bubble off level.
    Where there’s smoke, there’s fire.
    Don’t let the door hit your butt when you leave.
    Run away so fast your shirt tail can’t catch up till middle of next week.

  22. Priceless! “He’d buy a load of cord wood to peddle out in hell if you’d give him till Christmas to pay for it.” My third-great grandfather, who grew up in South Carolina and fled across the mountains to Kingston, Tennessee, in 1800 to escape gambling debts and “trouble with the church” related to horse racing, is said to have been “a trader and a shrewd businessman.” He went broke a couple of times in land speculations. This old Appalachian saying nails the gnarly old pioneer perfectly.

  23. If that don”t light your fire then your wood must be wet. (to really like or enjoy something)
    Catty-Wampus meaning across from –opposite from. or on the opposite corner.

  24. When folks came to visit, Mother met them at the door and said,”Get out and come in”.
    If someone knocked on the door she would say,”Come in if your nose is clean!”

  25. Kissin don’t last, cookin do.

    If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

    lookin like something the cat drug in.

  26. Smiling like a mule eatn’briars.
    Poorer than Job’s turkey
    Why don’t you stay the week or stay till you get weak?
    Stay longer and have less.

  27. This is somthing my grandmother used to say, you don’t pay for you raisin till you have kids of your own.
    My uncle used to say, he lies when the truth would serve him better.

  28. Birds of a feather flock together.
    Wish in one hand and spit in the other and see which fills up fastest.
    Lie down with the dogs and wake up with fleas.
    If wishes were horses then poor men could ride.
    And my favorite, “Can’t never could do nothing.”

  29. One my Father said to me. Son I got a crow to pick with you.
    Dad would say I looked and looked for that thang and I found it all at onct,
    Dad talking about a bad marriage. He drove his ducks to a bad market
    When I didn’t do a job to suit Dad He would tell me I had to lick my calf again.
    Dad would say you have too nuf or too none,
    My father-in law had some really colorful and insulting ones. He would say that woman was so buck tooth she could eat a pumpkin through a picket fence
    I never liked or understood one of his favorites. That fellow will run through that money quicker than a dose of salts through a widder woman.

    1. dose of salts refers to epsom salts, which’ll work as a laxitive right quick like if you drink it. why it works faster on a widow I can’t say.

  30. [said of an expensive car] I wish I had that one and he had a better one.

    [said of a speeding car on the highway] If you were on your way to Hell, someone would try to beat you there.

    [said of an arrogant person] If you could buy him for what he’s worth and sell him for what he thinks he’s worth, you’d have a fortune.

    [self-explanatory] If if’s and but’s were candy and nuts, we’d all have a Merry Christmas.

  31. Love these. I’m going to add a couple from George Masa, a little Japanese fellow who loved these old mountains we call home. He wandered amongst them, and led others in the wandering and wondering.

    “More walk, less talk.

    “Off your seats and on your feets.”

  32. One of my favorites I heard my Mother in law say one time in raising kids, ” It’s the Parents place to help get those Kids over Fools hill.

  33. “He’s got enough money to burn a wet mule.” Self explanatory.
    “Every tub sits on its own bottom.” Take responsibility for your actions – don’t blame others.
    “Cat fur to make kitten britches.” A pointless, unproductive waste of time.
    “Grinning like a mule eating briars.” Self explanatory.
    “Hog killing weather.” A fall day with temperatures above freezing and below 40 degrees.
    “Hotter than a two dollar pistol.” Can refer to ambient temperature or extreme anger.
    “Happy as a hog in slop.” Self explanatory.

    1. Whenever I (hope can indeed spring eternal) answered the homely query from someone about what I might want for Christmas, my father would smirk, “And there’s a man wanting outa jail.”

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