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Courting Memories

February 11, 2026

Pap and Granny

Pap and Granny

Pap and Granny only courted three months before they got married. Matt and I courted for four years! A much longer period of time, but the short courtship served Granny and Pap well.

I was surprised when I noticed the Dictionary of Southern Appalachian English doesn’t have an entry for courting. A quick look in the Dictionary of Smoky Mountain English showed me there was no entry in it either.

Both dictionaries do have entries related to the court of law.

I find it puzzling that courting isn’t listed. When I was a girl someone was always teasing me about courting so and so or asking me if I had started courting yet. I still hear the word used in the same manner today.

After my curiosity was peaked I decided to look through my other reference books.

Most didn’t have an entry related to dating as we would use the word nor even one connected to a court of law.

Southern Mountain Speech written by Cratis D. Williams had the following entry.

courting v. = attending court

Smoky Mountain Voices written by Harold F. Farwell, Jr. & J. Karl Nicholas had a similar entry.

courting: pres. part. attending court; litigating. “Bill, are they courtin’ up there yit?

Mountain Range A Dictionary of Expressions from Appalachia to the Ozarks written by Robert Hendrickson had an entry directly related to courting as we use the word.

courting man A ladies’ man, a rake, a womanizer. “He fancies himself a courting man.”

Mountain Born written by Jean Boone Benfield also had a related entry.

Courts like a stick of wood – Courting is, of course, paying court upon a person—in modern times, dating. Before a young man came to court a girl, he first asked permission from her parents. The two sat on the porch or in the living room, and talked. Maybe they took a stroll together. This saying refers to a man who courts a girl stiffly; he is not at ease. Perhaps he is shy and doesn’t know what to say to be interesting.
Will’s a right good boy, but Lord, he courts like a stick of wood.”

A Whole ‘Nother Language written by Isaac & Anna H. Ison had the entry I expected in the dictionaries.

Courtin—Dating.

The etymonline site shares this definition.

court(v.)

1570s, “endeavor to gain the favor of by amorous attention,” also “solicit, seek to win or attract,” from court (n.), based on the sorts of behavior associated with royal courts. Related: Courtedcourting.

Please tell me if courting means dating in your area and if the word is commonly used today.

Last night’s video: Starting Cabbage & Peppers | Forcing Blooms for Granny.

Tipper

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73 Comments

  1. Courting or courtin was very commonly used for dating in the 1950’s in Western KY. It was also common to drop the g off word endings. I haven’t heard people say that word in years. I remember watching Mayberry & Andy played guitar & sang a song about somebody “going courtin”. I can visualize him & Aunt Bea sitting on their front porch just can’t remember the lyrics.

  2. We have always used courtin. Any time one of us kids or the grandkids would start courtin Momma would sing ‘Froggy went to courtin’. She said they sang that when she was a girl too. She always sang it ‘swinging his pistol by his side’.

  3. Oh yes, here in NW NC, I grew up hearing ” courtin.” I heard it up until I guess about the middle 1970s, then not quite as much. Still do hear it from time to time.

  4. I still hear that word today. But mostly on TV. Like someone quoted Brisco Darlin from Andy Griffith show. He also says look away boys. When they were hugging or kissing. My husband and I dated about 4 years also and have just celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary

  5. When my husband and me were engaged, my grandad who is in his late 80s now said, “So you’re the young man that’s been courtin’ my grandaughter.” I thought it was so sweet! We only “courted” for four months and then got married. We both knew what we wanted and that was each other forever.
    I love hearing other love stories. Thank you for this love filled post!
    Love to you all!

  6. Tipper after I wrote you I failed to have you tell Matt how to fix lids of Granny’s pots is put a empty wooden spool after thread is all used and put little bolt and nut to hold on my Dad did that for my Mama’s lids.When I was younger and found my love it was in 3rd grade I met him and we called it claiming each other that was in Oklahoma,we went to school together,church together,engaged at 14,married at 16 ,he passed from this earth 9 years ago we had been married 66 yearsand 7 months,he was 85 years old I am going on 93 years old and would never want another man he was only 1 of a kind.I lost my Mama at 94 and my Dad at 98 both had terrible flu at small hospital and there was 78 cases in hospital Dad passed away there but Mama was able to go home for 2 years then she passed away and I still grieve for then both,I felt like Granny was my Grandma too.You take care.Joan

  7. I asked my mama this morning if she and daddy called it courting when they were young. She said, “no, I was just his girlfriend and he was my boyfriend.” Of course you have to understand that she was just a young girl. She and daddy became “girlfriend and boyfriend”after meeting when she was 14 and he was 17. She used to walk down the road in front of his house delivering newspapers. Each day, he would holler down at her from his front porch, and ask, “Do you still love me?” She would always say “sure”. They ended up getting married when she was 16 and he was 19. My dad passed away last year after almost 67 years of marriage. Mama misses him every day…and so do I.

  8. My father and mother met, courted, engaged and married in nine (9) days. They were marred for 50 plus years. My wife and I met, courted and married in about six (6) months and we will together for fifty-seven (57) years this year. I was raised in the northern part of SC and have heard the term courting all my life and understood its meaning was to be dating someone.

  9. Good day Tipper and Acorns! My hubby and I only went together a little while, less than 2 weeks in person. I was in Louisville Ky, him in Michigan. We met through a mutual friend he came to see on vacation. I called off a 2yr relationship when he asked to kiss me. Married 35 years this year, no regrets! My parents only went together 2 months. I always joke, I shop the same way, I know what I like.
    keeping you all in my thoughts.

    1. Hello Tipper,

      So very sorry to hear that Granny Passed away.I will be praying for all of you.My husband and I stated dating when I was 16 and he was 17 but we actually went all through school together. We did not call it courting we called it going steady. My hubby graduated in 1974 and I in 1975. We were married in 1976 so this year will be out 59th Aniversary in July. I was 19 when we married and he was 20. The memories we have are wonderful.

  10. courting- the early stages of dating; visiting together & becoming acquainted with each other’s family & friends.
    sparking- this is where the kissing & hugging & “making out” begins & the folks get “worried”! If it gets too intense the girl can “get it trouble” while the boy is just said to be “sowing his oats”.
    At least, that’s how I learned it from my mid-western & my South Texas kin.
    I’m afraid today too many consider sexual relations just another form of recreation very early in life.

  11. Courting was a common word as a child in W Va. Back in the ’70’s Joni Mitchell had a nice album titled Court and Spark. So sorry for the loss of Granny.

  12. My wife and I met in 1st grade in 1948. We shared the same classrooms for the next 4 years. She moved to a different school, but we again shared classes in junior high. A few years later, we ran into each other at the NC State Fair when we were 16. We courted for 3 years and married in ’61. Come April, we will have been married (hitched?) for 65 years.

  13. Courting is a very familiar term to me though I don’t hear it much at all. I am also very surprised it could not be found in those dictionaries. My husband and I only courted for six months and then were engaged and married six months later! We will celebrate 12 years of marriage this fall and could not be more happily married. ❤️ I thank God every single day for bringing us together.

  14. Good morning Tipper, my husband and I dated for 3 months before we got engaged. waited a year to get married. we were only 19 and 20 years old. Some said it wouldn’t last. but last September it was 44 years. When you know you know and you stick with it. Hope you and your family are hanging in there.

  15. Tipper–Another comment mentioned the word “sparkin’,” and that figures in a wonderful song performed by the Wilburn Brothers, the Osborne Brothers, Dailey & Vincent, and many others. The song, and it’s one I really like, is “Arkansas.” The relevant lyrics, written by Damon Black, are:

    Are the squirrels still a-barkin’ up on old Crowley’s Ridge?
    Has the girl I was sparkin’ gone and burned another bridge?

    I might add that to my ear, which is fairly well attuned to poetry never mind a singular lack of musical ability or knowledge, those two lines offer mighty fine examples of internal rhythm of the kind the poet of the Yukon, Robert Service, produced to such wonderful effect.

  16. here in Oklahoma when I was young it was used by older folks–I am 70–and people in my generation still use it but the youngens do not know what it means…the only ‘court’ they know is the one involving a judge

  17. Good morning ,Tipper. Our family used the word courting as well . I can remember as a little girl asking what a courting. There response there be none of that going around without a shotgun and me meeting them at the door boy did it scared me so bad. It was an ole saying they would say to us when it was all us girls my sisters had no brothers. Then I said would there be a shotgun if I were a son . Nothing from my parents that just meant your daddy was protected over his girls. Tipper you and your family are in my prayers . Death I look at it as a new seed that was meant to be planted by our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Granny is now been reborn and is in her new body like a seed her frail little body is free from it all she returned to the dirt which we were made from and her body being planted for you to visit to leave flowers or to plant flowers but we know her seed in now planted in Gods forever home his child that he called home. Tipper most of all she will forever be planted in you and your families and our hearts forever . You will see little reminders of her each day I’m sure of it and ole saying you once heard her say or come across something you may have never seen before from friends of hers . Snowflake are different everyone none are the same this was God way saying in my eyes to you child your momma is at rest I’ll spread some joy your way because I got a whisper from your momma you loved snow . So pure and white is the snow I send to you my child .Oh my what a rejoicing going on up in heaven her paved path made to come back home. I was always told we are to be happy and shed no tears of a passing loved one because it’s a celebration day because there up in heaven with no sorrow no pain a new body a new birthday they day they got called home. But to cry at weddings I do both it’s hard not to. Tipper, my initials are EW I never gotten a middle name when I was born but I can hear her middle name being used often in my family with my aunts and if they did choose I would of had her middle name to. They thought I was going to be a boy back then the name picked out for boy was Israel out of the Bible and so that changed when I was born . They had to pick out a girl name . So I was Evelyn with my married name it made EW . I just love your family so much because it reminds me of mine.

  18. The old southern plantation homes had a courting porch that allowed a couple to be romantic without the parents looking over their shoulders. We used to say we were going with a certain boy when we were in school. Now people say they are in a relationship when they are courting. My parents dated for a short time, just like Pap and Granny did. I’m not sure how long they courted, but it wasn’t very long. Until death do us part was the promise both couples made to each other, and they lived by those vows until they left this world.

  19. I heard my grandparents use the word courting but I don’t hear it anymore. We have always said, “dating, going together and going steady.” My husband and I dated for four years, and Lord willing come July 10th, we will celebrate our 50th anniversary. It doesn’t seem real that 50 years have passed, actually, 54 counting our “dating.” I was 18 and he was 20. Time is so precious. We try to make the most of every day.

  20. We still use sparking and courting. Sparking, when first going out with someone, usually through group activities that might convince each person to begin courting. Courting, when they’ve decided to date and learn more about the other person which might lead to becoming engaged.

  21. My wife and I had one date. Then for 3 and 1/2 months we planned the wedding. We will soon celebrate 62 years together. Now-a-days a lot of young folks move in together and claim to be engaged for several years before they break up or get married. I’ve known of a few couples with 2-3 children before they finally get married. One couple I knew got married one day and child number three was born the next day. To me dating was with several different people – maybe two dates in a row and dates with several others for a month or two before getting back to that one. Mom would ask “Who’re you going out with tonight”? I would answer and she would ask, “What happened with …”? “She’s got a date already so I called…”. Courting was a stretch with the same person = sometimes called “going steady”.

    1. Jackie, you wrote what I was thinking, read my comment, my wife and I “courted” 2 1/2 years before we married and did not “shack up” and were still “pure” when we married. I have been asked the secret to a long marriage. My answer, I can’t speak for others, I found my wife in church, not in a night club/glorified beer joint and not on a dating website. Church was always important in our lives. My best friend married his wife when she was 16 and he was 18 and had just graduated high school. He worked by himself in a cotton mill and let his wife finish high school. They married in 1973 and are still happily married. One secret, they have always been very active in their church.

  22. “Courtship” is one of those words that sounds maybe a bit quaint, but it’s a handy word to describe the duration of time between first showing interest in someone and marrying that person. It’s retrospective, therefore. In other words, folks might not have called it a “courtship” while it was going on, they might have called it by some other colloquial expression (like “She’s seein’ him”) but looking back, Granny could have described to the young Tipper, “Back during mine and Pap’s courtship…” etc., etc.

  23. I’ve heard the word courtin’ used in place of dating all of my life. Mom used to sing a song “Froggy went a courtin’ and he did ride uh-hum. Froggy went a courtin’ and he did ride sword and pistol by his side uh-hum.” Maybe Paul could do that song for his “Old Timey” series.

  24. Good morning, Y’all
    I hope everyone is fine and feeling well.
    In the early 80’s when I was young and a feller came call’n to court me, Daddy would ask me to tell the feller to come in the side door that entered into our den..
    also where Dad kept most of his Marlins, Colts, Remingtons, muzzle loaders, cross bows knife collection and such.
    Dad would let the feller get a seat then ask what his business was with his daughter.. usually while sharpening a blade or cleaning a Remington.
    Needless to say, I never did court much while I living at home.
    sending you all much love and many prayers.
    Y’all shine on and travel safe.
    ✌️

    1. Kim, I happen to be in my yard coming back in from hunting with a shotgun in my hand when a boy drove up to see my daughter. He told her he didn’t know where to stay or run when I saw your daddy with that shotgun! My father in law had 5 girls, he said anyone that dated his daughters had to either rabbit hunt, play a guitar, and drive a Ford vehicle. I met two of the requirements, I rabbit hunted and drove a Ford. I loved him almost as much as my daddy.

  25. Morning everyone. Like Barbara I Googled courting and got the same meaning. Courting leads to marriage. That’s interesting to me. Spending all but my first 4 years in California, I use the term “Dating” meaning the same to me as courting. I did leave Canada in 1959 so the California beach area wasn’t tourists. It was orange orchards and farms. All I ever heard was “dating”. Then in the Hippie years. My sister was one. They used “Hanging out” and “Seeing someone”. Both terms not the ones I would use. I lived a few months in Tennessee, no one used any term for dating. My mom never used any word, she never wanted to get married so that makes sense. I’ll leave you with an interesting one. My oldest son who is married and living in California dated a girl who was born in Iran. Her dad and sister are the most Americanized people. My son said “never use the word “dating”. In front of them. It’s almost a bad word. They use the term “having a connection” with the other person. Weird I know. Another good one Tipper. You always bring back fond memories. Anna from Arkansas.

  26. When my husband and I met at a ‘house painting party’, we knew that day we were going to be married. I’m happy to announce that was 26 wonderful years ago, and I haven’t regretted it for a moment! My mother-in-law, whom I loved dearly, had a very dry sense of humor, sang this little diddy on the long drive to get married.

    Well, I wish I was single again, again
    And I wish I was single again
    For when I was single, my pockets did jingle
    And I wished that I was single again

    There’s many verses, and I’m sure she knew every one, haha. We laughed for a solid 12 hours in the car. I miss her dearly!
    We sang Froggy went a courtin in grade 5, one of my favorite songs st the time!

  27. This is interesting. Yes. My older relatives used ‘Courtin’ ”Sparkin’, ‘Those two are sweet on each other.” ‘She’s seeing that feller now.’
    .. My generation tended to use ‘Dating’. ‘Goin’ Steady’. Sometimes ‘Seeing each other now’.

  28. Yes, “courtin'” or courting was commonly used in Roane County Tennessee where I was raised. All of my friends parents used that term, and so did we.

  29. Oh my goodness how words are used in different areas. I remember my aunt telling me many years ago that my grandmother and grandfather would go riding their horses when they were courtin. Before the automobile and down in NE MS. So I did hear that word but in my teen years dating was referred to more with she is going steady with so and so. And down south I heard sparking but the first time I heard the word courting was my Mother singing Froggy went a Courting and I did find the words but right now I’m not sure where I wrote them down. Nicole does have the beginning words right. I may be wrong but I think somewhere in there it refers to Miss Molly. I did find the words on some site about old English or Scottish songs.
    Froggy went a-courtin’, and he did ride, Uh-huh
    Froggy went a-courtin’, and he did ride, Uh-huh
    Froggy went a-courtin’, and he did ride
    With a sword and a pistol by his side, Uh-huh

  30. Courting. A great and sometimes funny subject sometimes. I have been married three times. The first courtship was four years while she was going to college. I had already graduated a year earlier. Our marriage lasted 16 years with three beautiful sons. The second courtship lasted six months and the marriage lasted 6 years. At the end if that marriage I moved to Hawaii where I gave up looking for a wife. I decided if it were to happen again I would let God bring her to me. Well He did through a friend who use to work for me in NH. He had moved to Florida with his wife shortly after I moved to Hawaii. After four I wanted to get in touch with him so I used the internet and searched for him. I got his phone number and called him. After several long phone calls my friend asked me if I wad dating an and I said no. He gave me a name of a woman he felt I would like to know. After much prodding I wrote this lady “snail mail” because she didn’t have a computer. After many letters back and forth we got to know each other. I finally asked my friend for this lady’s phone number. I called her and we spoke for about an hour. The once a week phone call turned to several times per week to once a day to finally twice a day. I was hooked. I had found the person I liked as a friend and I asked her to marry me. She said she would thin about it. I made the decision to move from Hawaii to Florida to be with my friend. Oh by the way I had not seen a picture of what Diane looked like and did not actually see her until I got off the plane. That’s right I did not see a picture if her at all. I left it up to God. We were married 1-1-1997 and have been married since then. We both laugh at the journey that brought us together. Me from Maine to NH to Hawaii to Florida to Murphy and Diane from Florida to Murphy. God lead us both on this wonderful journey. So whether it’s a few months or four years if God is at the center it will last. Have a blessed day.

  31. Tipper–Courting, dating, and going steady were the descriptions from my younger days. Also, your post brought to mind those rhythmic “sayings” Appalachian folks so enjoy.

    Tipper and Matt, courtin’ so high,
    Gonna get married on the Fourth of July.

    First will come love, and then will come marriage,
    Next will come Matt with a baby carriage.

    Of course you Matt’s (and your case) the carriage needed to be a double harness affair!

  32. “Courtin—Dating”
    That’s how it is pronounced and that is what it means, or as Briscoe Darlin’ might say, “let them younguns’ to their selves so they can commune”…………(something like that).

  33. Strange, I’m with you, always heard of courtin’ from my parent’s generation and further back. Can’t figure why it was not captured in your sources. Likely it has been replaced with the post-WWII boys and girls by “dating” in many places now but not all places. I expect there is within Appalachia some minor variations in words and meanings. Also think it would really be a job to try to identify those variations, if it is even possible. To me, courtin’ harkens back to kings and nobility being both judges and also being in a position to grant favors such that one meaning of courtin’ became ‘commending oneself to the attention and favor of another’. In my wife’s family, for example, an ancestor of hers was legally a tenant of Lord Thomas Fairfax whose residence was Greenway Court and he presided over the Frederick County, VA court. Her ancestor began life in America as an indentured servant and as such could not marry without the consent of the “owner” of his labor. So at one time, the legal and romantic were intertwined. (Sorry for the ramble but you set me thinking – again – as you often do.) By the way, the practice of indentured service lasted into the 20th century in some parts of Appalachia; for example eastern Kentucky, as a means of vocational training and/or caring for orphans.

  34. First off, my sincere condolences about Granny. I’m a crocheter and I enjoyed seeing her work. Not to mention she was just adorable.
    Now that does surprise me that it’s not in there. I’m in Kannapolis though I grew up in Salisbury. I remember hearing my Grandmother in Raleigh use the word courting. We didn’t though, we said we were going with someone. That sounds so strange now..lol. That was back in the early 70’s. My dad’s side of the family is from Wilkes County and I never heard him use it either. It’s weird how the language changes in areas not that far away.
    I love the videos from all of you..and the cookbook!
    Sending all of you my love and prayers.

  35. I think COURT is fitting personally! I mean you think you got a decent mate and then BAM! The next thing you know you are sitting before a know it all in a black robe who decides your fate based on how he slept last night or if you remind him of someone he detests. It seems perfectly reasonable to me—-not! Marriage was always intended as a way to keep and dispose of property, give a name to children born of a union, and let’s face it get rid of extra mouths to feed by sending a gal on down the road which rhymes either TOAD or frog and both are cold blooded amphibians… DATING AND COURTING mean nothing to me now and as far as I can tell it’s a perfect waste of time and resources. Nowadays it’s better to have a lease/ rental situation…. Don’t listen to me cause I surely don’t believe in nor have ever seen love since my grandparents died and when they were alive I saw it was mommy who did most of the giving and suffering and I ask many times “what is it all for?” I’ve spent more time crying alone to God than I ever can or would trust a man. Albeit, I’ve been severely traumatized. yall have courtin’ dating in your positive world. Ill read about the good times in the court recordings and legal documents. Maybe I’m a cynical stoic, but “Here’s to a man and here’s to me and if we should ever disagree-forget about him and here’s to me!!” Oh love is like a cactus you accidentally sit on while making a road side emergency stop in the dark to relieve yourself… YIKES!!!

  36. Hi Tipper, courting was not a term used where I grew up out west in California except by my great, great Uncle Robert who was raised in Arkansas and came out west in the dust bowl migration. I wanted to say that I don’t know how you bear the loss of a family member that you have practically lived with all your life. I lost my sweet father in November and I have been grieving hard. It is unfathomable how much harder the loss is for a family who has all lived (for all intents and purposes) together their whole lives. Condolences to you and your family.

  37. The term courting is only used by older folks here. If you say it to a younger person they call it old fashioned. A girl in her mid twenties I worked with laughed and said is he going to pick me up in a horse and buggy. Lol. They don’t say going steady either. It’s she’s my girl or he’s my guy. . Sayings change and I’ve stopped trying to keep up!!

  38. I am familiar with the term courting, but only because of reading it in historical novels. Growing up, we used the term dating. When I got older, I heard the term “seeing” much more, as in “Are you seeing anyone now?”. My husband and I dated 5 years before we married. Including that time and marriage, we have been together for 32 years.

  39. The old folks used “courtin” to describe a guy trying to gain favors with a girl (and her parents) preferably to lead to marriage. My generation (I’m 69) used to say “going with” or “going steady.” I learned that “Froggy went a courtin’” came straight from England as people sung it about potential suitors to Queen Elizabeth I of England, who never married. Our ancestors brought it with them when they came here.

  40. Most people said my wife and I were courting before we got married but my wife’s grandfather said that we were sparking.

  41. Good Morning, Tipper,
    I live in Indiana and have heard courting used in reference to more than casual dating, rather regarding dating with a view to marry.
    I send my heartfelt condolences about Granny again, to you and your lovely family. She reminded me so very much of my Mother who passed in 2017 at 92. I treasure every memory and am so thankful for the wonderful life my parents provided.
    Like Granny & Pap, my Mom & Dad had a very short courtship, 6 weeks! They were married 62 years when my Dad passed.
    My Mom also had a brother, Bill, called Junior, who moved to Detroit.
    I will miss your sweet Mother.
    My love to you all!
    -Suzanne

  42. I don’t know where the word “courting” came from, but I do know it was used in the 18th and 19th centuries in New England. Mostly, today people say they are seeing someone, or dating so and so. I wish I had asked my mother when she started seeing my dad in 1942, before he got drafted.
    I just love the photo of Pap and Granny ❤️♥️.

  43. Yes, that brings a smile! My Mom and dad used the same term when a young man or young lady was the age to be dating. In my area in Virginia, “White Oak” most of us still use that term when a new relationship begins.

  44. in the central Piedmont of NC it means dating. at least it does among the older generation. I would not be surprised if some of the younger folks aren’t as familiar with it. You don’t hear it so much any more.

  45. My wife was really the only girl I “courted.” In my area we didn’t court but “went together.” I knew my wife and her family all my life, we went to church and high school together. One Sunday night in January 1972 while sitting in a back row pew at church, not listening to the sermon but checking out the girls my eyes settled on her. After church I asked her if I could talk to her and it went from there. She was 16 and I was 17 when it started, we married in October 1974 at 19 and 20 years old and were together until April 15, 2021. My eyes never left here until then, my heart still belongs to her. In my mind I had the best, there was no need to waste time on the rest. Well meaning people tell me you need a companion, a widow lady at my church and a lifetime friend to both of us would be perfect, but my mind won’t ever let there be anyone else. We do talk some to one another and I think she feels the same way about her husband, they married young and were married almost 50 years. I tease, confess and say “I did glance at the menu every now and then but didn’t see anything on it worth losing her and my family on it.” I often teased her and told her God punished me for looking at girls that night at church. That is the biggest lie I ever told, she was a blessing in every way possible. I also liked to tease her and say you had better be good to me, you won’t find anyone else like me, she would come back and tell me “I pray and ask God if I ever get rid of you, I won’t find anyone else like you.” I THINK she was teasing! I passed by an old Kmart store yesterday that we often went to, I was “flooded” with memories of being there with here and am not ashamed to say, I shed some tears.

    1. Love this, Randy. I agree with those who say that in our older years, it would be nice to have a companion but not to remarry if we are widowed. I think close friendships are very important , whether male or female. In high school and college, I had a friend like that; we weren’t attracted to each other romantically but spent time together and were each other’s date to weddings and such we had to attend with a ‘plus one’. It’s also important to have friends who check on you and care about your welfare, people we can be open with without the romantic element.

  46. I am shocked that the word courtin isn’t in the dictionary. In Sevierville we always used it. We had an uncle that we couldn’t stand because every time we got around him he would say “You and Freddie Elmore still courtin?” Then he would spit his baccor juice. Yes, I know that is tobacco juice. Thank you for sharing Granny with all of us. I haven’t crochet any in years and she encouraged me to make 2 hats and get more yarn for another one. She will always be thought of as we continue to watch your videos. You look so much like your mother. She was so beautiful. I wanted to tell you that your white curtains are really pretty. God bless.

  47. My husband and I were “going steady” for 10 months before we married . I think my mama called it courting but we never did. This was in 1959.
    I loved seeing all the wonderful photos of your mother through the years. She was a lovely lady.
    I was blessed to have my mama until she was 92 years old.
    Keep on talking about Granny and Pap. I think it helps to talk about them. Some people think it will upset you to mention them, but to me it’s a comfort.
    One more snow would be nice then bring on Spring!

  48. Well, growing up in northeastern Ohio the word “dating” was used rather than courting. But my parents and family in KY used “courting.” sometimes. I remember an aunt in KY using the term “sparking” when I asked her where my cousin was. “He’s out sparkin.” Also, they would use the word “seeing someone” or “keeping company with someone.”

  49. Tipper, I’m in my mid-60s and have been familiar with courting referring to dating or “trying to win someone over” for as long as I can remember. My husband and I had a very short courtship- first date in April and wedding in June. And for 2 weeks of that time he was in Hattiesburg, Mississippi for National Guard annual training. We caused our mother’s some stress, putting everything together in so short a time but our wedding was simple and lovely, in my living room, officiated by a pastor who had known me most of my life. That was nearly 46 years ago and we’re still together. Both of our daughters had short courtships but their marriages are going strong. Our son dated his wife for a couple of years before they got married because he was still in college and only working part time.
    I’m sure glad to see your blog in my inbox again. And I’m continuing to hold you in the Light.

  50. Yes, the term courting is still used around my area (South Alabama). I’ve heard it all my life and it’s still popular (mostly with older people). We pronounce it “courtin” around here.

  51. Yep Tipper it was what my mom dad talked about when they were raising 7 children. I Corted Libby 1 year joined the army and took the girl with me

  52. There’s a song, but I don’t remember all the words. ‘Frog went a courting and he did ride uhuh” My Granny used to sing it. We’ve always used it too Tipper.

    1. I remember another song that had these lines that went something like this- if you want to be happy for the rest of your life never marry a pretty lady pick an ugly lady to marry you. I don’t think this is true, I was married for all of my life to the same lady and think she was the prettiest lady I had ever seen!

    2. I thought of “Froggy Went A-courtin” too, sung by Burl Ives and countless others, and “for courtin’s a pleasure and parting is grief . . .” from “On Top of Old Smoky.” I heard courting/courtin’ growing up, but rarely in recent years. I have never heard that term used in reference to a court of law or a court case.

  53. Tipper,

    I have watched you for the past few years and I feel like your family is my family. Growing up I had a large family. Except for my daughter, I don’t have anyone. A friend of mine was visiting and watched Celebrating Appalachia with me. He told me that I knew your family as if it were mine. I pray for all of you. I hope you find peace and adjust to losing your mother soon. I lost mine to cancer when I was thirty. I prayed often for Granny.

    Here in Knoxville I hear the word courting rarely. Usually it is when someone is teasing someone. I read a lot and don’t remember not being familiar with the word.

  54. Good morning, Tipper, Matt, Paul and Acorns. Courting is still a term used here in Johnson County, TN. I googled it and there seems to be a lot of interest in Courting vs Dating. Though similar, they are not the same in action or intention. TY for leading me down this rabbit hole. It is very interesting. Courting is an intentional, often traditional process focused on determining marriage suitability with one person, typically involving family, while dating is generally a more casual, open-ended, and modern approach to getting to know someone. Courtship prioritizes commitment and emotional/spiritual alignment, whereas dating may or may not lead to serious, long-term commitment. I thought about myself and my relationships thru the years and I had a lot more courting than dating going on. I prefer courting even though it is said to be more formal than dating. I’m just a more formal, serious or even business-like kind of person. I keep everyone here and up Wilson Hollow in my prayers. Hugs of comfort too. Love y’all.

  55. I’ve always heard courting or “courtin” as another word for dating growing up. I find that odd too that you didn’t have much luck with finding it. Now I will be singing this song in my head all day

    Froggy went a-courtin’, and he did ride, Uh-huh
    Froggy went a-courtin’, and he did ride, Uh-huh
    Froggy went a-courtin’, and he did ride
    With a sword and a pistol by his side, Uh-huh

    Whether 3 months or 4 years, God has a way of bringing the best together for sure ❤️ we are keeping you all in our prayers.

    1. I remember that song “Froggy went a-courtin”! I sang it in our music classes all through elementary school. I love that old childhood song. As a preteen I would sing it to my niece and nephews when they were little to make them laugh. Then later when I had my daughter when she was little. Years later when I became a grandmother, even through I had forgotten all the verses but just that one you posted and the chorus to my granddaughter. I was beginning to think I was the only one who remembered it because when I talk about the song, nobody my age (66) seems to remember it, not even my husband. As many times as I sang it to the kids in my family , now that they are in their 40-50, they don’t seem to remember it either. Thank you for posting about this sweet, humorous courtin song from years gone by.

  56. Good morning, Tipper. It was surprising to me also that courting was not in those dictionaries. I remember hearing my grandmother use the word around 1950-60’s. She also said so and so were “talking” and then I have heard someone “seeing” a person meaning dating.

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