Fishing with Coffee and Biscuits
This fellow, Quill, he lived way back in the woods and he hunted and fished all the time, and didn’t pay any attention to the hunting seasons or laws or anything, and he knew the woods better than the game warden.
The game warden had been trying to catch Quill for a long time. Today he knew the sign was right—he knew Quill would be up early to go fishing. So he snuck down there in the middle of the night and hid up on top of Quill’s house. This way he knew he had the jump on Quill. He’d let him head out and then he’d follow him, be right on his trail, hide in the woods until Quill had caught a large, illegal bunch of fish, and then catch him.
As it started to get a little bit of daylight, he could hear Quill get up start a fire, and put the coffee on. His stomach started growling at the smell of that coffee and those fresh-smelling biscuits as they baked in the oven. He could hardly contain himself, when out walked Quill on the porch and hollered, “Come on down here and git some of this coffee and biscuits while they’re hot! I know you’re out there!” He went back in and shut the door.
The game warden could not believe it. He climbed down and walked up on the porch and into the house and exclaimed, “Well, how did you know I was out there?”
Quill said, “I didn’t. I walk out there and say that ever morning, just in case ye are!”
—Fred Park – Berea, Kentucky – “Curing the Cross-Eyed Mule”
That’s a story that will leave you smiling 🙂
I’ve never been one to fish other than a few times when I was a little girl or when The Deer Hunter and I were dating.
Several years ago a dear friend played a good joke on me.
There was a bunch of us gathered up. We’d been out for a day of hiking, but had returned to their house before saying goodbye.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door and a game warden was ushered in. He immediately asked for me and then started inquiring about my vehicle being seen illegally fishing a few days before. I was dumbfounded and trying to figure out what was going on when suddenly I noticed The Deer Hunter and all my friends had backed away from me leaving me to sink or swim under the game warden’s stern questions. That’s when I realized something wasn’t quite right and the room irrupted in laughter 🙂
The game warden wasn’t actually a warden but was a very good actor! We still laugh about the prank today—it was a good one!
Last night’s video: Mourning the Death of Summer.
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Love rhis story!
TIPPER ,
I LOVED THAT STORY ABOUT QUILL AND THE ONE ABOUT TOO. IT FEELS GOOD TO LAUGH. I HAD A TRICK PULLED ON ME WHEN I WAS MUCH YOUNGER. MY BROTHER AND HIS FRIEND NEXT DOOR HATCHED THIS JOKE UP TOGETHER. I WAS OUTSIDE AND OUR PHONE RANG AND WHEN I ANSWERED A MALE VOICE TOLD ME IF I COULD ANSWER ONE QUESTION, I WOULD WIN A CLOCK RADIO. THE QUESTION WAS ONE THAT ANYONE WOULD HAVE KNOWN. WHO IS THE LONE RANGER’S SIDEKICK, OF COURSE I SAID TONTO. ABOUT THIRTY MINUTES LATER. HERE COMES MY BROTHER AND HIS BUDDY CARRYI A SHOEBOX FILLED WITH ROCKS WITH ” WCGA” WRITTEN ACROSS THE BOTTOM OF THE BOX(THAT WAS OUR LOCAL RADIO STATION) AND THEY HAD DRAWN THE PICTURE OF A CLOCK ON THE SHOEBOX TOO. I WAS MADDER THAN AN OLE WET HEN. I DIDN’T SPEAK TO THEM FOR A VRRY LONG TIME.
Quill wasn’t his real name it was just a “pen name”.
Thank you for the laughs and giggles! Prayers for Granny and bunch. Ya’ll are too funny!
What a great story! Loved it!!!
Haha…..thanks for the laugh (and vivid warm cabin breakfast scene!!)
Tipper this is gonna be one of them stories that is gonna be stuck in my head all day. I loved this story. Made me travel right along and like I was hid some where watching all what was gonna happen. I myself could almost smell them biscuits. I can’t wait for my husband to get home so I can tell him this one. If any one is a fisherman he is. This man can fish fish and more fishing. He dreams it eats and loves and also a good hunter to. Tell Granny hi and We’re still sending her name up to Our wonderful Jesus. I sent her a card but I put your address on it.
I love both Fred’s and your stories! They both had me chuckling. I love reading about the fun stories and when they are true life fun, it’s even better. Thank you for sharing them with us!
Since today’s post is about 2 humorous stories, I want to mentioned a book that I have been reading. The title is Cotton Mill Cowboys and Other Characters I Have Known by Richard Thorpe. It is humorous stories about growing up in a cotton mill village. One of the stories is titled Cotton Mill Status. It has to to do with reaching a “boss” status in the mill. One is about a man being being given a plastic pencil holder to be put in his front shirt pocket and him not having a shirt pocket but of using a safety pin to pin it to his shirt and this one made me think of Matt and his recent retirement, when retiring after working 50 years a man was asked what he was his proudest accomplishment. He said it was earning the status of “screwdriver boss” this is being allowed to carry a screwdriver in his back pants pocket. I know many of us grew up and still live in the southern states and at least for older ones have knowledge of the cotton mills and the cotton mill villages. Greenville, SC was once called the Textile Capital of the world. I have heard the older men of my life say when they were young you had two choices when starting out your adult life, they were working at a cotton mill or farming and growing cotton while looking at the south end of a north bound mule all day long.
Great way to start the day with a good laugh! Prayers for all. Take care and God bless ❣️
Ole Quill was a clever one wasn’t he. Lol That’s too funny. Enjoyed the story.
The prank they pulled on you was a good one too, I’m sure that creates plenty of laughter every time it’s brought up and they are not gonna let you live that one down. Thanks for sharing.
A bunch of years ago I asked a young lady If she liked to fish. She (very enthusiastically) said she loved it. I said if she would pack a few sandwiches we would go fishing. She took along a quilt. (She claimed it was for a table cloth.) Turns out she had never been fishing before. I still say she said she loved fishing so she could get me on a quilt down on the river bank. It must have worked out the way she planned. Next month we will celebrate our 59th anniversary. (I had a license. She did not and the only thing caught was me.)
ONLY in the hills would a feller INVITE the law trying to bust him and ruin his life over for fresh coffee and homemade hot biscuits. This story was a good one for sure but I swear if the law was on top of my house, I’d have to smoke em out or throw something on them like scalding water or hot grease or worse. I ain’t taking kindly to any man on top of my roof like that! It’s a declared act of war against me in my view. Tipper, that deer Hunter must try to rile your dander up sometimes. He must be a real card! I wouldn’t ever believe the law would be after the Appalachian ambassador of goodwill… it’s just not ever gonna happen. They might stop by for a slab of homemade cobbler or apple stack cake, though. Lol Prayers and good wishes to your mama. You’re all a bunch of living dolls!!!
Good stories! Thank you, Everyone, for sharing them.
The book, Curing the Cross-Eyed Mule, can also be found on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Curing-Cross-Eyed-Mule-Loyal-Jones/dp/0874830834.
Loved this one….Good humor!
That was a good one on you, Tipper. My brother-in-law went fishing with a friend from work and about the time they settled down on the tailwaters a game warden walked up. He didn’t introduce himself and asked if they had caught anything. The friend started back talking, name calling and being downright belligerent. My brother-in-law just knew they were going to be arrested and lose their fishing privileges forever. Come to find out the warden was the friend’s brother who played along. Fishing has always been my favorite hobby.
Love this story!
Quill was a sly ole’ fisherman… Wonder if there were really biscuits available? LOL
Good one, Tipper!
Have a blessed day <3
Theresa
P.S. Loved the vlog last night with the surprise, late green beans!!
There’s a piece of the story that Tipper isn’t letting on. She tells it as if this game warden just made up some offense. It ain’t so!!
The day this happened ought to be noted; it was on June 11,2011, when Tipper, Matt, Lonnie Dockery (another of our friends who has crossed the river), Chatter and Chitter, Susan and I had a wonderful day in Cataloochee. It was when the girls recorded Undone in Sorrow (https://blindpigandtheacorn.com/undone-in-sorrow/). If you’ve not listened to that, do yourself a favor and enjoy the young girls’ wonderful singing and acoustics of Little Cataloochee Baptist Church.
After the girls recorded the song (Corie insisted on toting her own guitar the mile in and out to the church, by the way), we went over to enjoy watching a summer storm pass from the loft of the Caldwell barn. It was a wonderful day, full of great memories, and another one yet to be made.
The crew stopped by our house to have Na-bers hamburgers for supper before heading on back to Brasstown. We’d arranged for that to happen ahead of time, partly because we thought it would be a good ending to the day, but also because it set the stage for what was to happen.
Here’s the background which Tipper didn’t relate…..
Ken Roper, as the Blind Pig followers will remember, forded the Nantahala River for the last time earlier this year and is now resting on the other side, under the shade of the trees, was the one who got all this started. Not long before that day, Ken had told me about a fishing outing on the Nantahala where the trout were really hitting, and our Angel of Brasstown just had to get in on the action. As I recall Ken’s tale, Matt knew that she didn’t have a fishing license and tried to warn her, but she just shrugged the warning off and went ahead and joined in, adding to the haul.
Jonathan Mattox, who grew up next door and is now an attorney, was working as an intern with the Park Service that summer, wore an official uniform and had access to a marked Park vehicle. Now the Park Service has no jurisdiction in the Nantahala Gorge, but we figured that really didn’t matter; the uniform and the vehicle, plus a prominent and loud walkie-talkie would carry the day.
I had told Matt about what was going to happen, but didn’t mention it to the girls.
Jonathan showed up and keyed in the walkie talkie out in our driveway. You could easily hear it; I called attention to it and said something like “There’s a game warden out in the driveway – I wonder what he’s doing?”
Jonathan came, knocked on the door, and nailed it. He kept a straight face the entire time – just absolutely deadpanned it. He said that he had witnesses who had reported that the owner of the vehicle in the driveway had been fishing without a permit, and , as I recall, said he was going to have to impound the car. Now Tipper is seldom at a loss for words, but you’ve never heard the like of sputtering and stammering.
As I say, I didn’t tell the girls what was going to happen, and I saw Chitter fishing in her pocket for her pocket knife.
It was about that time when Tipper turned and saw Matt grinning like a possum that she figured out that she’d been had.
Ken and Lonnie, if you’re reading this up there, I hope it brings back as warm a memory for you as it does for me.
Don-in typical Ken fashion he was elaborating quite a bit to make a better story 🙂 I didn’t do any fishing that day but I did help one of the girls untangle their line where it caught in the branches 🙂 I feel the same about Ken and Lonnie! My day is always brightened when I come across the many photos I took that day-from carrying that guitar to the singing to the sweet fellowship with dear friends it was a wonderful time even if I was almost arrested 🙂
Don are you saying Tipper didn’t tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
Enjoyed reading both stories. There’s nothing more relaxing than throwing that line out and waiting for the big one to hit! I love it!
If you’re in the path of hurricane Idalia, I pray that everyone is safe. Continued prayers for all the family. Love you all.
My Dad’s friend Roy, a notorious prankster, pulled a similar one as they did on you. He and Dad had met the game warden up the road out of sight of the rest of us when we were down on the creek picnicuing. Roy and Dad came back with the warden inhis jeep and Roy tells this tale about if they can’t come up with some unreasonable sum the warden is going to take them both into jail for fishing without a license. Dad and the warden weren’t talking. Roy’s wife Lula knew in a minute what he was up to. Mom was the one afraid until Roy burst out laughing. That Roy, and his brothers, were a caution.
Believe I’ll be chuckling about this story on & off all day. Awoke early to check on our current hurricane Idalia. Here, we had barely any wind until now and still, hardly. Light rain now means the sand will stick to my shoes but won’t be leaving for another hour or so for errands.
Perhaps, I should cook up some biscuits.
Love the story about Quill, but I think siccing a pretend warden on you was just plain ornery! At least these days, game wardens are kind of scary!
Good morning. That’s funny . Have a good day.
Fred Park, storyteller and dance caller extraordinaire, and his wife Jenny Armstrong were in residence at the Folk School for a time in the early 1980’s. Their daughter Suzannah taught singing classes there more recently. Fred died of cancer last month. There was a wonderful memorial celebration of his life at Warren Wilson College on August 19.
Those are two good and funny stories to start the day. I wondered if that prank on you was Matt getting back at you for when you put his truck up for sale. Thank you for the smile and the laugh, I needed it this morning. I have only been fishing one time and it was at a small little pond on a family friend’s property. Really learning to fish is something I hope I get to do one day.
God bless Granny with healing and health in Jesus name
Those were such funny stories to enjoy with my morning coffee. Wow! You sure got a lot more beans during your video last night. Enjoy your last canning. I ended up with 14 pints of peppers the other day. I had already frozen quite a few bags. They are still growing like crazy. I may get to can a few more soon. We tasted the extra I had after filling my jars and they are hot. My husband is so excited about that. He thinks the hotter, the better. Have a good day everyone.
Reminds of a yarn from North Queensland. Out of Season, Kevin had been down at a beach and snared a small Turtle. As he put it in his cat boot (trunk) a Fishery Officer (FO) appeared, please that he had caught Kevin and gleefully explained the fine and trouble due for Kevin. Kevin explained that “Terry” was his Pet and had brought him down for a swim and could prove it. When the FO scoffed at this, Kevin offered a demonstration. As agreed, he took the Turtle down to the beach and let it go. 10 minutes later when the FO asked when the Turtle would be back, Kevin replied, “What Turtle?”
My grandfather was a gamekeeper and always said if a local poacher was talking to him, you could bet his friends were somewhere nearby up to no good! Keep your friends close and your enemies closer!
Too funny!!! Everyone stay safe today with the winds and rain that hurricane is bringing to several states.
Prayers for Granny.
Was that payback for when you put Matt’s truck up for sale? ☺️
I had the same thought : )
That is a very funny story, both of them today. My dad used to be in so much trouble for hunting outside of hunting season. He finally got caught by the game wardens when he got an alligator once. lost his truck and gun in that one. Served him right though… that’s what drinking will do to ya… make ya do stupid stuff.
Anyway, love your stories!
On a side note, my dad was out with the game wardens brother and he got arrested too. lol
Laura Lee, my dad was in trouble with the game wardens and the drink as well. Dad got caught once “road hunting ” with the local judge. Lol.
Loved the story. Wasn’t he a smart one…every day. Loved it. Putting a garden to bed for the winter is easy and hard…the labor and the thoughts of what you have harvested all season. You have really been blessed with all kinds and many beans. Nothing like a good pot of beans and bacon bits. Praying for Granny and you guys.
This is a good funny story and Matt or whoever came up with the idea, pulled a good one on Tipper. This is suppose to be true, back when I was a young boy, it was told on some members of our church that were friends and not real particular about the game laws. The main character was a man called Munk. Munk and these men were “fishing” at a local river using a method called “telephoning”- cranking an old time crank telephone with a bare wire in the water shocking the fish. Everyone but Munk was concerned about the game warden, he had told them he was friends with the game warden and the game warden wouldn’t bother them, a different game showed up on this particular day and fined all of them. After this, Munk was always teased about dialing the wrong number.
Back in the early days when the game laws were first be implemented, a garden warden didn’t get very much respect, now I think a game warden has more “authority” than any other law enforcement officer.
Tipper, is “Curing The Crosseyed Mule” a book?
Randy-it is a book full of humorous stories 🙂
Tipper, I have done /already found and ordered a copy of this book from eBay $4 including shipping. I love reading stories like today’s two. I wish I could have seen the look on your face!